No One Knew

This entry is part 1 of 6 in the series Marital Abuse/How to Spot an Abuser

For the whole month of November, missionaries Jeremy and Liz Pinero and I took my 4 little “grand-angels” and lived up in the mountains of Big Bay in Vanuatu doing all the . . . well . . . jungle-stuff – like washing our clothes in the river, crouching over a fire to cook, doing […]

Defining Domestic Violence

This entry is part 2 of 6 in the series Marital Abuse/How to Spot an Abuser

Coming:  Series 2 – Why the Abused Stay;   Series 3 – Why Abusers Abuse;    Series 4 – Helping the Abused We all occasionally lose our tempers, but within a short time we realize the damage we’ve done and broken-heartedly ask for forgiveness and a restored relationship. Marital abuse is in a completely different universe. […]

Cycle of Abuse

This entry is part 3 of 6 in the series Marital Abuse/How to Spot an Abuser

Learning of the existence of this well-known pattern of behaviour is often a shock down to the very core of the abused’s soul.  When that passes, a wave of immeasurable relief sweeps over this wife feeling uniquely alone,  isolated and trapped.  It is the confirmation of her sanity after all. Let’s take a closer look […]

Emotional and Mental Abuse

This entry is part 4 of 6 in the series Marital Abuse/How to Spot an Abuser

  Like the tiny destructive termite in “No One Knew” (post 1 of 6 in this Series 1 of 4 “How to Spot an Abuser”), a marriage can be destroyed by “a thousand little razor-cuts of perpetual contempt, put-downs, sarcasm, lies, rudeness, rages, insults and silent treatments, even though a physical mark is never left.”1 […]

Financial and Spiritual Abuse

This entry is part 5 of 6 in the series Marital Abuse/How to Spot an Abuser

So far, we’ve covered physical violence and the cycle of abuse, plus emotional/mental abuse.  Another method an abuser uses to get and maintain control of his wife is … Financial Abuse He may make her account for every dollar she spends, limit her access to money, and keep her in the dark about income and […]